What’s a cat’s favorite dessert? Chocolate mouse! How do you make an octopus laugh? With ten tickles. How do you keep a bull from charging? Take away its credit card! What do you get from...

A nurse walks into a bank, exhausted after an 18 hour shift. She grabs a deposit slip, pulls a rectal thermometer out of her purse and tries to write with it. When she realizes her mistake...

A husband insisted on making love to his wife in the dark, after 10 years of making love this way. His wife one day decides to turn on the lights, and was shocked to see her husband holding a remote...

A guy walks into work, and both of his ears are all bandaged up. The boss says, “What happened to your ears?” He says, “Yesterday I was ironing a shirt when the phone rang and I accidentally answered...

This morning at about 7.45, I was in a long line at a grocery store that opens at 8 o’clock for senior citizens only. A young man came from the parking lot and tried to cut in at the front of...

Three friends stranded on a deserted island find a magic lamp. Inside it is a genie who agrees to grant each friend one wish. “I want to go home,” says the first friend. The genie grants his wish. “I...

A man takes his sick Chihuahua to the veterinarian. They’re immediately taken back into a room. Soon, a Labrador walks in and sniffs the Chihuahua for 10 minutes and leaves. Then a cat comes in...

Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce were walking down a dark scary alleyway, when a bloodthirsty vampire jumped out from behind the dumpster. The vampire attacks Travis Kelce and drains all his blood. The...

Joe Biden’s nagging wife dies suddenly on a trip to Jerusalem. The funeral director says to him, “sir, it would cost about 45000 dollar if we send her home back to the states. Or 500 dollar if...